Today was a day that started off at about 1 am to the barking seal cough of croup brought on by my oldest's asthma. I shouldn't be surprised in the least with the influx of smog and smoke that is slowly disappearing after 3 weeks of gray skies. Again we were up at 4 am and 4:30, finally to adminster her Xopenex via nebulizer and ibprofin for her raging fever. My poor baby, 4 and a half years of this and suddenly I'm no longer fearful of croup. I can even wake up with out feeling mad and upset that I have been waken up (sleep is the one and only thing i mourned when becoming a parent). Instead I have slowly grown and gained a maturity, maybe because I am away from them most of the day, where I am actually thankful for the extra moments of tenderness and calm that I try to shower on my sick baby until her lids grow heavy and she passes back out.
I knew from the first time I was up with Lyssa, that I would be calling in sick to work today. Thankfully I had tied up all my loose ends yesterday and was able to call my boss and tell him exactly what was needing to be done today. He wasn't thrilled, but I think he also realized that at least I'm sticking it out long enough to train someone! And it hit me as I got off the phone with him, how much I missed the lazy days I had as a stay at home mom.
I went back in and snuggled in next to Lyssa, turned off my alarm and made sure I could hear the moniter for when Kiki woke up. I dozed back off with a smile on my lips, thankful for any excuse to spend the day with my girls and a few extra minutes of sleep. I jolted up to the phone ringing at 7:48 and cursed my boss, only to be surprised it was Ben. He hadn't realized i'd been up all night with a sick girl.
This is one aspect of our newly reconciled marriage that many don't understand, but it seems to work for us. Most nights I have Lyssa in my bed in my room, and Ben sleeps on the trundle bed in their room with Kiki in the daybed or toddler bed (whichever she chooses lol). We have been a co-sleeping family since we first became parents. Then had Kiki and Lyssa and Ben moved to their own bed and eventually another room because Kiki grew to dislike co-sleeping and the crib in the bedroom with our Cali queen bed just became too much for me. Not to mention the fact that Lyssa didn't sleep through the night til three and a half. . . as i mentioned before, i'm selfish about my sleep and basically kicked them out of my room and made sure ben was capable of tending to Lyssa since I was up every 2 hours with a babe on my boob.
Anywho. . . it works for us. Occassionaly we get a night of sleeping in each other's arms, but it's not good sleep for me. I prefer to have the bed to myself, and the darn moniter has started picking up the newborn upstairs since aparantly they have the same moniter as us. So i was woken up by Ben, filled him in this morning and layed back down to figure out what I needed to do today.
I got the girls up, gave them breakfast and hopped in the shower. I realized that these days are gone. Lyssa starts school in August and even though i'm returning home and no longer working outside the home, we wont be able to just sleep in on days that we've been up all night since we will have school. No longer will we just hop in the car and go to the park, or head out to the bay area for a day or two. I've sacraficed the last 2 years of my own schedule, I'll mourn it another time lol
I've been doing good with diet. I wont bore you with the details, but yesterday I consumed 1384 calories and worked out for 45 mins. Today i will be doing pilates and 30 mins of cardio and have consumed about 650 calories and haven't had dinner yet! Progress, slow and steady!
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