This weekend my kids and I escaped to the coast. We had originally planned a family get away with BK and his kids, but his daughter and him were both feeling poorly and by Sunday it became evident that neither of them were in any condition to spend time at the breezy beach. So we let his older kids know we would reschedule for a time later in the summer and I decided to make it an adventure for me and my three. It was suppose to be over 106 in the valley and I knew I needed to get away, clear my mind and find my zen. And the ocean is the one place I always can count on finding it at.
And so we headed out ready for adventures, though not ready for the traffic due to construction. But despite the longer than expected drive the kids were troopers and we giggled and laughed throughout the ride. When we pulled up to our hotel they were over the moon that they got to sleep in a "real hotel" and couldn't wait to see what I had planned. We checked in, unloaded, put on our bathing suits and hit the Monterey beaches with an excitement. It was a perfect 75 degrees and despite how cold the water was, all three spent hours frolicking in the surf and playing tag with the waves. At one point I sat with my toes deep in the sand and watched them play tag and build sandcastles giggling and laughing and loving each other and I felt a place of my heart shift, and peace filled every part of my soul.
The kids loved the time and we cleaned up and packed up headed off to dinner at a local restaurant. They were amazing and well mannered and I looked at them and thanked God for how much he'd blessed me. The girls enjoyed their hot cocoa to warm up with and my son enjoyed his very first Shirley Temple, though he doesn't have much of a sweet tooth and only finished half. We ate our dinner talking about the fun of the day and then headed back to the hotel where we snuggled into bed and watched movies till we all passed out by 9. My son who never sleeps in, actually slept till 7:30 which shocked me. His head popped up and he said, "Mommy, can we live here a thousand years?" I laughed and told him I wished but this was a place for vacations and special getaways and if we lived here we might not love it so much. I'm pretty sure he didn't buy it for a second and he's just as much as a beach lover as his mother.
We ate our breakfast in bed, enjoyed some tv and then got ready for the day. We headed out to the aquarium and reveled in the wonders of the ocean. My son, who has sensory issues, was amazing. Minimal meltdowns, only a short lived tantrum when he became terrified the hammerhead shark would get through the glass, and he used the bathrooms all day without any accidents. I was impressed with his ability to handle a very sensory overloaded situation and thankful for how much work and progress we had made over the last four years. He has made me never take for granted moments in motherhood that I previously did. Having 3 well mannered and calm children who waited their turns and shared their excitement sweetly without any fighting the entire day was a gift to this mama that I was thankful for.
And I realized how far I've come through the years. Two years ago this would have been impossible to do alone with my son's sensory stuff. Juggling all three, especially a toddler would have been so exhausting I wouldn't have gone. But as I've gained experience and peace as a single mom I find more and more calm and joy in these moments. It isn't just about finding zen on the beach of a beautiful place. It's remaining calm and teaching my kids how much fun things can be, even when little things don't work out how you plan them. It's remembering that eventually these babies won't be so little anymore, and they will be teens with busy plans and adults with their own families. These are the years that are the most important as a mother, and I enjoy each moment we get together. I don't know if it is because I'm now in a stable and committed relationship that we both know will end in marriage, but having little moments like this with the kids are important and something both BK and I have agreed is integral to our lives as a blended family. He was excited for us and so sweet making sure we were loaded up and safe and ok to go, and while we missed him like crazy, it was good to have moments with us like it has been for years. It makes me thankful for the healthy relationship we have where we are able to be a blended family, but still take time for the needs of each of our individual children. There isn't any jealousy or concern about what the other is doing, because we both know that our kids are young and they deserve and thrive on taking moments out like this for them.
As I get home and unwind from our trip I am grateful for these little getaways with my babies. I am thankful for the progress we all have made. I am thrilled for the fact that my children and I actually love to spend time with each other and make memories we love. I am blessed that this has become my life and I have a supporting and loving partner in life who holds the same desires and goals in life for all of our children. And I am glad that I was able to find my zen after the emotional month we've had with family stuff. Sometimes all you need is a little bit of peace and the smell of the salty waves to bring you back to what's important in life.
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